Connection

Repeated connections, the same names, the same actions, the same company. Creeping into her universe slowly and then all at once. The chances are always there to take, would she settle into old patterns? Or, find a new way to deal with things? The tests would come in waves, soothing and crashing together. An infinite amount coming, always. She would withstand and be knocked over, sucking in salty gulps, choking on the elements. She would float, and accept it, bobbing and occasionally slip under the force. She would get out of the ocean entirely, just say, "fuck this shit" and get out but, the peace of the current would draw her back in. The silver lining would twinkle and that's all it took to get back into the thick of it. The brambles nicking at her bare legs, reminding her that she could ignore it or keep going, blood streaming down and clotting. The sun shining through the trees, to remind her to just keep going. Don't forget the forest lies here, between all of the leaves. When she searched for meaning, it didn't go anywhere. Nothing is ever quite so clear for her until the dust settles. Intrigued by an old connection, maybe something that she wasn't meant for before. Mostly, it was meant to be left alone. Curiosity getting the best of her always. What did she mean to learn from repeated old connections resurfacing? The broken things, the wayward people, the interest from a past admirer? The traits that made her life feel like deja vu, 'you did this before' it says. But, why? 'Why am I doing this again and again and again?' What is it that she must do differently?