Hung Up

I lay in my bed and look around the room. The string lights give a soft glow as I think of moving the pillow behind my head. I have changed so much and I congratulate myself. I have so much information that I never share. Great job, Bets. I realize it several times in the last day or two. I see where I have changed, where I have grown. I still have a little bit more to go. I don't know how long it will take to get there. The ball began to roll and it's picking up speed. Maybe it'll be easier to get over this. Maybe not. I'm not sure. I just keep moving. I guess the part where I realized what I wanted was the part that struck me the hardest. It was a gradual thing to get over just the idea of it. But, now I know. I know what it is like. I still find myself being told things I should already know. I forget to erase the "but" part of talking about what I have to offer. I get reminded and I will get there eventually. I'll stop that part of self deprecation one day. When I realize that deep down, I really am worth more. Today, I am just going to move slow. I am beginning again. Starting is the hard part. I'm all out of excuses- so.... HERE WE GO!